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The Decision to Work

August 17, 2011 by Caren Roma

I never felt I made a very good stay-at-home mom. My idle hands and mind crave deadlines, accountability and lots of social interaction. I am reminded of this every time I have a few days at home by myself or when I have been in between jobs. The first few days function like a water faucet, filling up my emotional and physical energy depleted from running around like a crazed superwoman short on time. But once I’ve had my fill of solitude, the quiet settles around me, heavily. I don’t enjoy the stillness in my mind, wonder what everyone else is accomplishing and assume that while they are out creating very important documents for very important people and curing cancer and saving the world and educating kids and laughing and enjoying themselves, I am home, with my forehead pressed against the sliding glass door, questioning my purpose in life. Those voices in my head that come out around day three of quietude and pester me about my existence? Yeah, they can be mean.

Between the time Lennon was an infant until he was three years old, I stayed home with him off and on, and honestly, I was terrible at the job. Lennon was bored, and I was bored. Even when I structured and scheduled out the day and signed him up for art and gymnastic classes and sought out play dates and remained vigilantly on the look out for massive and enthralling road and building work where we could gawk at backhoes like construction groupies, I still pined for 5:00 p.m. and my hubby to come home. I knew exactly how long it would take Scott to drive from his office to the house, and if he hadn’t arrived by 5:15 p.m. I was on the phone, crankily demanding an ETA. The mornings when I called him at work before 8:30 a.m. desperate to know how I was going to make it through the day are not what I consider highlights of my parenting career.

I really wanted to feel fulfilled staying home, but I never felt at ease in the role of a stay-at-home mom. By the time Calla was born, I had already tried various combinations of work and staying home, and I had determined, that for the sake of my sanity and our pocket book, it would be best if I headed back to work full time.

Fortunately, my kids love going to school. They spend their days with teachers who enjoy teaching them about things like the lifespan of a whale, and painting water-colored sunflowers and singing songs, and socializing with their friends. I think one of the best things I have ever done for my kids was to be honest about my need to work full time, and to acknowledge my limitations as a parent, and to be okay with calling upon the help of loving and caring teachers who have been thrilled at the idea of spending their days crawling around on the floor with my kids.

As much as I am at peace with my choice, or as much peace as I can possibly be in this society of guilty parenting, I still second guess myself regularly. Especially when a well-meaning parent raises her eyebrow about the amount of time my kids spend in after school care each day and launch questions at me, like when will they have time to study the violin or piano. And to this I say, three things: first, my kids don’t play the violin or piano, nor do I expect them to start anytime soon. Second, they take their lessons when we get home from work, and so far, that seems to work for us. Third, us mommies, we need to stick together and be supportive of the choices we make or are forced to make with our lives and our kids. There is no perfect parenting environment that fits for everyone. What works for one family isn’t necessarily going to work for another, so let’s be mindful and kind to each other.

I have spent the last seven years refocusing my career so I can work normal hours in an environment that is flexible and allows me to chaperone field trips and attend school events when they arise, and I have come to realize that I am a better mother when I balance my life with a career. A dear friend of mine realized she needed to quit her job to be home full time with her kids. Both decisions were difficult to make, and both are equally right.

I had a hard time trying to decide what sort of recipe to include in this post, but I think the most appropriate option for a piece like this is to just encourage take-out. On the toughest of days, a local restaurant can be the best friend of working and stay-at-home moms alike.

Posted in family, parenting | 10 Comments »

Goopy Little Hands

July 19, 2011 by Caren Roma

Last weekend, Calla helped me make dinner. She was helpful and engaged. She stirred the sauce, poured and mixed ingredients and pressed up right.next.to.me. while I chopped and diced. I did my best to breathe deeply, let her have fun and not micro manage her when she sploshed sauce over the side of the sauce pan. She did great, and I twitched a lot, forced myself to refrain from making snappy comments and just let her be a part of my kitchen.

I am trying to cultivate more patience with my kids when they help me cook. I wish I didn’t care when floors and clothes got wet, or dirty or covered in paint or tomato sauce, but the wiring in my brain that gives me the patience to be crafty and focused with children is faulty. I have a tendency to short circuit and get bossy easily and say things like, “give me that,” and “let me do it.” I like my cupcakes to look pretty instead of smooshed, I hate picking up bits of paper and glitter off the floor, and I don’t like cleaning paint or glue off my or my kids’ fingers. I avoid most art projects that involve moisture and colors that stain and schedule activities that don’t involve scrubbing hands and faces afterward.

My aversion to messes doesn’t spill over into other areas of the house. I don’t seem to have a problem with piles of papers or clothes. I am not even all that bothered by clutter although I am definitely neater now that we have kids. But I can’t seem to handle wet gloppy kid messes. Even as a kid I didn’t like getting my hands sticky, though I did love to play with flour. I love how soft and cool flour feels while sifting through my fingers–until it turns into a wet gummy paste and then flour is quickly added to the icky list.

I want to let the kids slop on the frosting when decorating cupcakes and not feel my body tense up when they accidentally dump glittery sprinkles onto the floor. My kids have aprons they can wear, and I have a powerful vacuum and a Costco supply of sponges. We spend a lot of time in our kitchen, so I need to be able to teach my kids to cook while refraining from snatching items from their hands when they threaten to pour the entire contents into a dish. How bad could three extra tablespoons of oregano be in a pasta sauce? Apparently, we won’t be finding out because no matter how hard I try to contain my mild obsessive compulsive perfectionist tendencies, I end up hovering over my children, futzing and clucking while I attempt to keep spills to a minimum.

Scott has much more patience with the kids in the kitchen than I. I could leave the impromptu kiddo kitchen classes to him, but that just feels like I am giving up on my kids and myself. I don’t want to miss out on helping them grow up around the chopping block and stove. It would be easier to shoo my kids out of the kitchen and cook by myself instead of slowing down and taking the time to teach them how to chop vegetables and create meals. With limited time to wedge chores, fun, classes, homework, baths, sports and dinner into an already packed evening or weekend, I find it hard to slow my brain down to the speed of my five-year-old. I like to be quick, precise, efficient and focused when attempting to get a meal on the table in under 30 minutes. That said, it isn’t fair of me to deny them the opportunity to experience cooking and make mistakes in the kitchen.

Despite my desire to cook by myself last weekend, I worked really hard at maintaining patience so Calla could enjoy herself and feel welcomed. I had to quietly tell myself to slow down a few times, which definitely helped me keep focused on her experience and remain calm. I had to remind myself that a spill can be wiped up easily and hands are super easy to rinse off. And even a less than tasty meal is only a minor inconvenience. I am trying to keep my kids’ kitchen failures in perspective. I expect as my kids grow older and maintain better control of their hands and are less likely to push half of dinner out of the pan and onto the stove, I will feel more comfortable cooking with them. In the meantime, I plan to keep inviting them into the kitchen no matter how much my body involuntarily lunges forward to prevent potential mistakes. I will cut myself a break though, and let them do the gloppy art projects at school.

Below is my stuffed shells recipe. The vegan ricotta involves smooshing your hands into the tofu to get it the right consistency. It’s a great recipe for kids to help make– and a task I much prefer to let them handle.

Stuffed Shells
Directions:
-Preheat the oven to 350 degrees.
-Fill a large pot with water and bring to a boil. Once the water starts boiling, add in an entire box of jumbo pasta shells.
-While you are waiting for the water to boil and shells to cook, begin making the tomato sauce and tofu ricotta.

Tomato sauce ingredients:
2 large cans of crushed tomatoes
1 tablespoon of olive oil
5-6 cloves of minced garlic
1 tablespoon of oregano
1 tablespoon of dried basil or a small handful of fresh leaves that your kiddo harvested from your garden
6-7 good cranks of the pepper grinder
Salt to taste

Armed with her trusty pair of kid-friendly craft scissors...

...there was no reason she couldn't tame the bolting basil herself.

Sauce directions:
-Heat the olive oil over medium heat in a large sauce pan
-Add the garlic
-Saute until the garlic has turned golden
-Add the two cans of tomatoes to the garlic (give the can opener to your kid and see if he/she can open it on their own) and the rest of the ingredients and simmer on low

While the sauce is simmering, start making the tofu ricotta. This can also be made ahead of time and stored in the fridge.

She started off thinking it would be fun to stick her hands into a bowl of squishy tofu.

But her face quickly proved that she loves sticky, messy fingers about as much as I do.

Tofu ricotta ingredients:
1 block of firm tofu, mashed by little hands if you have an extra pair living in the house
½ to ⅔ cups of Veganaise
2 tablespoons dried or fresh dill
2 teaspoons fresh basil (leftover from the earlier harvest)
2 teaspoons onion powder
2 teaspoons garlic powder
½ teaspoon pepper
salt to taste

Ricotta directions:
-Mash the tofu into a large bowl until it is a crumbly and mushy
-Add all the ricotta ingredients and stir well until it begins to resemble the consistency of ricotta
-Adjust seasonings to taste

Assemble:
-Once everything is ready, take a large casserole dish and scoop a few heaping spoonfuls of sauce into the bottom and spread evenly.
-Take a large soup spoon and stuff each shell full of the tofu ricotta.
-When you have snuggly filled the casserole dish with stuffed shells, cover the shells with the remaining tomato sauce.
-Bake in the oven for 25 minutes or until the sauce is bubbling up on the sides and the filling is heated through.
-Serve with homemade garlic bread and a huge tossed salad.

Posted in dinner, Italian food, main dish, parenting, Recipes, Sauces, Uncategorized, vegan | 6 Comments »

Snacks for Dinner

July 5, 2011 by Caren Roma

Last Thursday, Calla suggested we eat snacks for dinner. Her menu included soy yogurt, ice cream, spring rolls and Popsicles. Lennon requested Costco-style “samples” and dim sum. I didn’t feel like cooking a full meal and neither Scott nor I were interested in the remaining items on our weekly menu. He had eaten Asian food for lunch and didn’t want stir fry, and I had eaten a burrito and didn’t want Mexican. We weren’t able to find cilantro at the Farmer’s Market so fresh spring roll salad with a peanut sauce dressing was off the menu and Falafel would take too long.

After a week of crazy deadlines, skipped lunches at work and general heat malaise, I was feeling a lack of motivation and desire to enter the kitchen. Grabbing a recipe book for last minute dinner ideas wasn’t going to happen. I liked Calla’s idea of snacks for dinner, with some healthy modifications, of course.

Calla wasn’t happy that I changed up her menu. There was some compromising from me and lots of whining from her. I eliminated all the desserts, which basically left the spring rolls. I pulled out some hummus, leftover tofu ricotta from a stuffed shells recipe earlier in the week, carrots, celery, raw broccoli and marinated tofu and put together a veggie platter. I heated up the leftover pasta sauce and threw in a handful of frozen veggie meatballs, microwaved some cashew cream cheesy sauce leftover from a macaroni and cheese casserole from earlier in the week and assembled a couple of sandwiches which I cut into quarters. And I heated up a bagful of those awesome frozen vegetarian spring rolls from Costco–snacks and dim sum all in one. A container of seaweed salad, which Lennon deemed, “too chewy,” rounded out the meal.

Snacks for dinner wasn’t bad. It wasn’t great either, but I’ve been trying to be better about using up the leftovers in our fridge. I can’t say the fusion of Italian, Asian and hummus felt particularly awesome in my stomach, but for dinner on the table in 25 minutes after a long day, a much needed clearing out of the fridge, and a win for the kiddo who suggested the idea in the first place, snacks for dinner served its purpose.

Snack managers surveying the samples.

Posted in dinner, family, Leftovers, parenting, snacks, vegan | 2 Comments »

About as Adventurous as a Bowl of Oatmeal

June 27, 2011 by Caren Roma

I’ve lost my spine. I was the girl who used to jump off 50 foot cliffs, ride roller coasters for the adrenaline rush and surf in the washing machine waves off the coast of Santa Cruz. Now I am just a middle-aged mommy wuss. While on vacation I took Lennon body surfing. He loved it. I thought it was pretty great too until a wave ground my body into the unforgiving shore and left sand imprints and bruises all over me. While I churned in the waves, the thought of my seven-year-old getting just as pounded forced my heart to drop a couple of feet into my knees. He was fine and loved the rough action of the waves. I got all motherly, gave a quick lecture on waves, rip tides, never turning your back on the ocean, blah, blah, safety, boring mother rambling on about something (insert the sounds of Charlie Brown’s teacher’s voice here) and then suggested we hang out in the pool for a bit. He promptly declined my offer.

I had hoped my spine hadn’t completely turned to mush, but I know it began going soft a couple years ago when I rode California Screamin’ with Scott and his cousin Ami at Disney California Adventure. She’s my age and single with no kids. She was thrilled by the rush of the roller coaster, five gazillion loops and those horrible stomach lurching death drops into a hellish abyss. I was not. I prayed out loud, a lot, and cursed, a lot. I remember tearing up with relief when the ride finally ended. I crawled out of the car with sweaty palms, feet and my stomach trying to decide what exactly to do with my lunch. The guy I spoke with afterward who gave me a medical understanding of what the brain experiences on a roller coaster didn’t help my recovery either.

When I was younger, I swore I would never lose my spine for all things exhilarating. I would jump off cliffs just to mess with the head of my boyfriend who was afraid of heights but still felt compelled to jump if I did. I am sure he would enjoy knowing I was getting my karmic justice now. I blame motherhood. I never expected having kids would turn me into a bowl of mealy oatmeal.

I wish I could say I was carefree and relaxed about parenting and exposing my kids to adventurous situations, but I struggle with the idea of letting them experience life on their own. I battle my over-protective demons every single day, try to keep my mouth shut about the little dangers and save the lectures for the big ones. Lennon is getting to the age where he is going to start filtering my warnings, so I need to pick my freak outs carefully. Do I warn him about the slippery, muddy trail that he insists on running down? Sure, but I will try to limit my comments to just once in the beginning of the hike because when he lands hard on his bottom, the mud and bruises aren’t going to kill him. The fall may even teach him to be careful more than my yelps down the trail at him to “slow down!” Do I give him the “respect the ocean” speech and go swimming with him in the waves so his tiny 48 pound body doesn’t get pulled out to sea? Absolutely.

I couldn't have kept up with him on the trails, and yes, I tried.

He wore his mud stains well and with pride.

I know that just because I can’t seem to stomach the adrenaline rush anymore doesn’t mean I should encourage my children to live bland lives. Though the thought of my children jumping into crashing waves off a cliff into the ocean and getting sucked down and disappearing into a cauldron like we witnessed a few local boys do last week makes my whole body quease up–the part where we wouldn’t be able to save those boys should a rogue wave knock them out was particularly painful to watch. Adventure is good, but pushing the limits of life and death, not so much. I need to help my kids discern which is which and then trust that as they get older, they will make the RIGHT, I mean, mindful choices.

After a great deal of prodding from Lennon and some pointed looks from Scott, I toughened up and went back out into the waves and by the end of the trip, I was able to enjoy the ocean with my kid instead of constantly fearing his demise. I realized that the presence of the boogie boards we rented on the last day functioned a bit like an ocean security blanket for me. My reacquainting with the ocean and Lennon’s three days of experience navigating the waves definitely helped. Plus, we weren’t by ourselves on a remote lava shelf jumping into a churning cauldron of death. If something had happened, my chances of saving Lennon or finding someone who could were pretty great. Ironically, watching those boys jumping off that cliff helped me put body surfing on a relatively mild beach in front of a hotel into perspective.

As our kids get older, we will introduce more adventure into their lives. I am looking forward to 10 years from now when we can take them on the Napali Coast Kayak trip, and in the meantime, I will work at using those adventures as exercises to build up the muscles surrounding my soft spine. Perhaps some smaller adventures will keep it from atrophying altogether.

In the spirit of mush, I am re-posting a recipe for oatmeal but with some new toppings. My kids eat oatmeal all year long and since we recently visited Hawaii and already miss the tropical fruit, I suggest throwing in some fresh banana, brown sugar and topping it with chopped pineapple and toasted coconut. See, even oatmeal can be adventurous sometimes.

Homemade Oatmeal (Total cook time is 10-15 minutes.)
Directions:
-Add about a cup and a half of soymilk to a cast iron pan.
-Add in thick cut oats by the handful until they just begin to reach the top of the milk.
-Add a couple of dashes of cinnamon.
-Add a pinch or two of salt.
-Heat until the soymilk starts to boil around the edges, then drop to a medium simmer.
-Stir frequently as the milk begins to cook down and the oatmeal thickens. You want to keep it from sticking to the bottom of the pan. My kids like their oatmeal slightly chewy so adjust the milk and simmer down to desired thickness.
-When the consistency is right (there really is no science to oatmeal), remove from heat and add chopped pineapple, shredded, toasted coconut, brown sugar, bananas and a touch more milk if you like.
-Serve with a side of toast and lilikoi jelly.

Posted in breakfasts, oatmeal, parenting, Recipes, Travel, vacation | 1 Comment »

The Pleasures of Strawberry Papayas

June 23, 2011 by Caren Roma

I ate my weight in tropical fruits this week–apple bananas, strawberry papayas and pineapples. While other vacationers were planning their Kauai trip schedules around luaus, snorkeling excursions and weather forecasts, we were busy planning ours around the daily farmer’s market schedules. A day trip discussion between Scott and me sounded something like, “Let’s go to the North Shore on Tuesday. We can’t go on Wednesday because we won’t make it back in time for the Kapaa Farmer’s Market at 3 p.m.” A drive through town most often involved a shout out to pull the car over because the banana lady hadn’t packed up yet, and Monday brought the sinking realization that we had missed the Koloa market and would have to attend the smaller Lihue market instead. We’ve eaten so much tropical fruit I am amazed my gums and the inside of my mouth aren’t raw. Though if I hear myself say, “that was the best pineapple I have ever eaten!” one more time, my ears may start bleeding.

We wondered if the fruit we bought from the farmer's market on Wednesday would last us until Thursday.

We visited Kauai for the first time during our honeymoon 11 years ago and luckily, we stayed in a condo with a blender. On a whim, Scott froze two papayas in an ice cube tray to see what a papaya smoothie would taste like. What started as an experiment turned into a vacation breakfast addiction, I mean tradition. Now whenever we are on vacation in Hawaii, the first thing we ask the hotel is the status of the blender. Room with a view overlooking the ocean? Sure, that’s a nice bonus, but, does the room have a blender?

I love papaya smoothies. LOVE THEM. I dream about their lovely creamy orange sweetness in January when the gray blues are settling into the crevices of my brain. I tell my friends to make papaya smoothies every time I hear one of them is headed to Hawaii. They graciously nod their heads, make some mmm hmm sounds, say things like, “ooh, that sounds good,” and smile at me vaguely. Maybe I am being too pushy and gregarious about our smoothies. Perhaps I should suggest they add rum, or I could get all grandma-like and send around a print schedule of where to find the Farmer’s Markets on Kauai to make things easier. Honestly, it would be a lot more helpful if I could recreate for them on the mainland what I so adore on the islands, but I can’t. Strawberry papayas and apple bananas don’t travel, and to try and blend a similar concoction at home with sub par tropical fruits is not worth the money and disappointment.

But, should you happen to be in the lovely Hawaiian islands this summer, here is the recipe. Make sure you stay somewhere with a blender, and a beautiful lanai and bonus view of the ocean, of course. And remember, there is nothing wrong with scheduling your hiking, snorkeling and various island adventures around the harvesting and purchasing of good, local fruit.

Papaya Smoothie
Ingredients:
-2 ripe strawberry papayas (check with the concierge for a listing of Farmer’s Markets around the island, or careen off the side of the road at the sight of a fruit stand)
-2-3 apple bananas (where you discover papayas, so too you will find bananas)
-Some pineapple is optional but not necessary
-Enough soy milk to keep the crappy hotel blender from seizing on the frozen mass of fruit

Directions:
-In the evening, slice open the papayas and remove the seeds. Scoop the papaya out of the skin by the spoonfuls into an ice cube tray. Onto a plate works fine, too.
-The next morning, add the frozen papaya, soy milk and banana to the blender, pray the engine doesn’t die or overheat, and blend until you have a smoothie with the consistency and creaminess of a milkshake.
-Drink and repeat.
-Serve with fresh, local, mashed avocado on toast.

Like I said, a blender in the room is absolutely imperative.

Posted in breakfasts, smoothie, Travel, vacation, vegan | 3 Comments »

The Serious Business of Valentine’s Day

February 13, 2011 by Caren Roma

When I was a little girl I loved Valentine’s Day. I adored picking out boxes of valentines, receiving treats from friends, and the color red. The holiday felt happy and easy to me. While helping my kids put together their valentines for class parties, I realized how much the holiday is a girl event in my household. When my son began attending school, he couldn’t be bothered with giving valentines to his classmates. Writing his name was a chore, and I, the valentine task master had to see to it that he wrote his name 26 tedious times. He paid scant attention to which cards he addressed to his classmates and had to redo one when I delicately pointed out that he had just addressed a card professing sweetness and love to his least favorite kid in the class. He was lukewarm on deciding upon homemade baked treats and requested only that I not make chocolate cupcakes. This year, we went his old standby, almond thumbprints shaped into hearts with a strawberry jam filling.

 

At least the standby is a tasty favorite.

My daughter is old enough now to celebrate Valentine’s day with her classmates and she approached the holiday very differently. The other night, while I tucked her into bed, she dictated how she planned to prepare her valentines. Like a mini project manager, she explained to me what she planned to write, when she would “work” on them, how there needed to be stickers involved, and that she wanted chocolate cupcakes with pink frosting and heart-shaped sprinkles as treats for her class. She was very specific about the chocolate.

 

The icing and cake decisions were a serious business.

 

She sat diligently at the table, and wrote not only her name, but the word “love” on each card. She squealed loudly when she discovered the cupcakes in the morning and made sure to dress in one of her favorite shirts for the school party.

For years I thought the holiday of love was awkward, complicated and kind of crappy. To me, it was a holiday symbolizing unreasonable expectations and exclusion of those unfortunate (or fortunate) enough to have avoided being stabbed by cupid’s arrow. Even with a loving a partner, the holiday still has the potential for skewing sideways. Having an exuberant daughter, excited about bits of papery love and little heart stickers, makes me embrace the holiday again.

 

Posted in dessert, holidays | 1 Comment »

Pancakes for Dinner

January 12, 2011 by Caren Roma

Until recently, I had no idea I wasn’t eating good pancakes. For years I cooked flacid, sub par, wanna-be pancakes. I wrongly assumed vegan pancakes could never be fluffy and were a breakfast treat lost to vegans along with eggs and white birthday cake (the latter of which I am still searching for a successful recipe). But then, on New Year’s day, after a long night of helping a good friend say goodbye to a crappy year, my sister blessed my husband and me with the most beautiful stack of vegan pancakes I have ever tasted. Her pancakes sat in front of me, covered in maple syrup and Earth Balance margarine, like an airy stack of 24 hour diner flapjacks. They were the kind of pancakes you gratefully consume at dawn, after a night of some serious celebration during the college years. I, of course, ate mine at noon as an unexpected treat while picking the kids up from a sleepover with their cousins, and last Friday, we ate them for dinner with a side of Gimme Lean Sausage or “soysage” as we call it, and homemade smoothies.

So from now on, I won’t even bother with any other recipes for pancakes. I expect these would be fabulous with a mashed up banana or a handful of blueberries thrown into the batter, but until I’ve made up for my lost years on crappy pancakes, I will just enjoy them old-school style–plain with margarine and maple syrup.

The recipe comes from vegweb.com, and Vegweb if you are reading my blog, this devoted vegan thanks you. One thing to note about the recipe: every recipe I have ever followed for pancakes claims you shouldn’t over stir the batter, and that some lumps are fine. This recipe calls for stirring the batter until smooth. While that step may cause you to pause and question, don’t. Just follow the rules!

Posted in Uncategorized | 3 Comments »

Moderating the Cookie Gluttony

December 31, 2010 by Caren Roma

I had a brief moment yesterday, between gluttonous handfuls of leftover Christmas cookies, where I decided I was going to do a six week sugar detox. I also made a birthday resolution to train for a half marathon. Maybe it was my self disgust for my unabashed consumption of vegan cookies that caused me to pause, with a Russian tea cake in my hand and powdered sugar dust on my scarf, and declare a boycott on all sweets. Fortunately, about 24 hours later, I realized my ban on all things sugar-laced was completely unrealistic. Ironically, I didn’t come to the same conclusion about training for a marathon. Maybe it’s because running sounds easier than eliminating sugar. I feel crazy for even writing that last sentence.

Personally, I don’t believe in short-term diets for weight loss. They are a temporary, unrealistic solution to a long-term problem, which is precisely why I realized my ban on sugar was not going to work. As the sugar levels in my blood decreased, I remembered my “everything in moderation” motto. I don’t need to permanently remove cookies, and chocolate, and cupcakes from my diet. That would depress me, because I love to bake and eat treats. I just need to not eat homemade treats by the fistfuls during the holidays. Unless I am willing to make a major lifestyle change, one in which I truly believe–like eschewing all meat and dairy for diet and ethical reasons or adopting a new appreciation for the sounds of my feet hitting the pavement in a slow trot–the sugar stays. In considerably lower doses, of course.

After a Christmas cookie exchange at our house and an extravagant display of vegan cookies on Christmas Eve, the favorite and most requested recipe was the vegan Mexican Chocolate Snickerdoodles from Isa Chandra Moskowitz’s, Vegan Cookies Invade Your Cookie Jar. She has posted the recipe to her website, The Post Punk Kitchen, which includes a video of how to make the cookies. A few things to note about the recipe: I’ve never found chocolate extract at the store and usually just double the vanilla extract. I like to add a heaping pinch of rock salt to the cinnamon sugar topping, because chocolate, cayenne and salt together is soooo tasty. Also, the dough is on the wet side so I usually end up adding in a small handful of flour to make the dough more pliable. These cookies are chocolaty and spicy–a lovely “adult” cookie and nice accompaniment to a glass of champagne on New Year’s Eve.

 

A cookie definitely worthy of eating by the fistful.

Posted in baking, dessert, holidays, Uncategorized | 2 Comments »

A Letter to My Leftovers

December 20, 2010 by Caren Roma

Dear Leftovers,

We’ve had a rough relationship. You provide good eats on some days, but too often you smack me in the face with some nasty smell you’ve kept tucked under your lid. Unless I consume you within a day of your creation, I don’t trust you to behave well towards my nose or my stomach. You’ve wronged me so many times that it’s not easy picking between you and one of those freezer-burned burritos from Trader Joe’s…although you have been winning by a small margin.

Unfortunately, you and I have been forced to become closer this past month ever since the hubby and I started tracking our expenses. Like counting my calories on the LoseIt App makes me not want to eat, tracking our expense calories in a spread sheet takes all the fun out of spending. That means you and I need to learn to get along. Normally I can bury you in the dark space of the fridge behind a suspect batch of refried beans and a bagful of veggies and try to forget about you. But ever since I instituted a ban on impulsive lunches, I’ve had to turn to you for lunchtime support.

Then yesterday, you helped me produce this:

A crunchy salad with fresh cilantro and mint, tossed with a peanut sauce.

 

Fresh lettuce, carrots, cilantro, mint, and rice noodles leftover from our vegan spring rolls the other night tossed together with a peanut sauce dressing and some cut up squares of marinated Wildwood Tofu made a fabulous salad. 24 hours later, I sit here in my cube eating leftover homemade panang curry (tasty but a losing second compared to that salad) and I am still thinking about you. In fact, I want to elevate your salad concoction to main course status so I can eat you again for dinner and then dream about you as my lunch the next day.

So thank you for the memorable meal and bless you for not rotting the noodles. Keep up the good behavior and you may start spending more time in the brighter side of the fridge.

Sincerely,

Your Reluctant Eater

Peanut Sauce Salad Dressing
This recipe is an adaptation to the peanut sauce we make for spring rolls, and can serve as a fresh break from the heavy holiday meals. In your blender or Vitamix, combine the following ingredients:

2 heaping spoonfuls of smooth peanut butter (not the sweetened kind)
1/4 cup rice vinegar
1 teaspoon of fresh grated ginger
1 medium garlic clove (remember it is blending up raw, so be careful about the quantity . . . unless you want to be tasting repeats the rest of the day)
1/4 cup tamari
A splash or two of  mirin
2 tablespoons sesame oil
1/4 cup orange juice

Blend together and adjust for salty and tangy. It is really hard to mess up a peanut sauce so don’t worry too much about the measurements. Serve with your favorite leftover Asian-style salad fixin’s.

Posted in Leftovers, lunch, Salads | Leave a Comment »

Balancing the Holidays

December 10, 2010 by Caren Roma

Chanukah came early this year, and it forced me to fully acknowledge the impending holidays well before Thanksgiving. Our family celebrates both Chanukah and Christmas, and not because we are full of holiday cheer. My hubby Scott and I decided early in our relationship that we wouldn’t deny the other’s culture for the sake of ease, though, before we had kids, it was fairly easy to celebrate both holidays. I would spend 20 minutes putting up our mini wrought-iron tree, and he pulled out a menorah. Done. We bought gifts for family, and made jam, candles, or some other crafty treat. We always had an invite to the parental abode so we never had to host the holidays ourselves. We could act grumpy, feign mild interest in the holidays and nobody cared about our bad attitudes.

Now we have kids. Kids + holidays = game changer. Kids magnify our own childhood memories and with that comes the desire to create new memories. We want to share our holiday experiences with them, and that means actually lighting all eight candles, decorating a tree, and using project management skills to organize for a holiday season that I used to, for the most part, ignore. Now, I create a Google Doc that I share online with Scott, deny the financial reality of January, and spend the rest of December trying to make sure I am not slighting either holiday or child.

Every year we begin the holiday discussion roughly around September. I make some grand declaration about saving money and keeping the holiday consumption within reason by shopping sales and making gifts. We have a jovial debate (out of earshot from our holiday-loving kids of course) about whether or not we should even decorate a tree and put up the house lights. Ironically, the discussion ends with my Jewish hubby making the final argument in favor of some decorations. I uphold my tradition of swearing to have a small, homemade, quiet Christmas, and then sometime about mid-December, we morph into these shopping sprites, jittery from lack of spending, and starry-eyed over sparkly online deals. I decide we don’t have the right balance of toys for each holiday, re-read and reorganize my spreadsheet, run out to buy more items, dig everything out of the back of the closet with the help of my headlamp, sort through the piles of gifts, and wrap everything in color-coded wrapping paper (blue and white for Chanukah, and green and red for Christmas). I worry there aren’t enough gifts, and then, when we combine our loot with presents from the rest of the family, I realize we’ve purchased too much and end up saying to Scott, “Next year we are toning it down.” He looks at me, shakes his head, and says something like, “Yeah, good luck with that.”

I do love the coziness of Christmas Eve. I like singing Christmas carols with my sister in the kitchen as we make dinner, following the NORAD Santa tracker on the laptop, and opening gifts with my parents early Christmas morning. I love playing Santa and staying up late to stuff stockings and build toys. I love making latkes with my in-laws and the way our fully lit menorah looks while flickering in the window. I LOVE watching my kids’ faces when they discover presents sitting on the fireplace and under the tree in the morning. All of those moments balance out my manic spreadsheet management, the stress of dual holiday celebrations, and concerns about credit debt.

After my failed attempt at Halloween crafts this year, the kids and I tried again and spent an afternoon making dough ornaments for family and friends. I think we all had fun rolling dough and playing with paint. The dough tastes foul so I definitely would refrain from trying it though it shouldn’t hurt your kids if they feel so inclined.

This craft project was much more fun than making construction paper chains for the tree last year.

Classic Salt Dough Ornament Recipe*

Ingredients:
2 cups flour
1 cup salt
1 cup water

Directions:
1. Mix the salt and flour.
2. Add in half of the water, then gradually add the remaining water.
3. Knead until the dough is smooth, this can take up to 10 minutes. You may need to add more flour to get a smooth consistency.
4. For flat dough ornaments roll out the dough on a sheet of parchment paper.
5. Use cookie cutters, cut-out templates, or just use your hands to make shapes.
6. Dust the dough with flour, add details to the ornaments with a toothpick, popsicle stick, and/or knife.
7. Use a toothpick/straw to make a hole so you can hang the ornament, or press an ornament hook into the back before baking. If you forget the hole, you can always drill a small one later.
8. Set the oven to 325 degrees and bake for 1 1/2 hours or until the ornaments are dry. Time may vary based on the thickness of the ornament.

Decorate:
Let the ornaments cool before you begin decorating. Paint with acrylic paints. Let dry and then to preserve, coat with acrylic varnish (Modge Podge works just fine) when the paint is dry. Glue on beads, buttons, googly eyes, puff balls, and pipe cleaners.

Ornament Ideas:
Snowmen
Dreidels
Angels
Numbers
Animals
Letters
Turtles (use walnut shell for back, stuff with dough, add feet, a head and tail)
“Holiday words” (e.g., Joy)
Cars
Shapes (circles, squares, hearts, wreaths, cubes) – Painted or decorate with hand prints, year, names, faces, etc.
Sports stuff (balls, bats)
Trees
Bugs

*Thanks to my friend Julie for the recipe and creative ideas.

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